I should be happy. After weeks of not knowing, International House Of Prayer-Kansas City has accepted me into their prestigious One Thing Internship (as of 5-29-08). My future looms in front of me. I’m excited because this means change, hundreds of miles worth of change. But I’m scared too. What if I misread the signs and I’m not meant to go to Kansas City? I’d be so heartbroken.

It helps that I have friends who believe in me and what I’m trying to do. Becca, Carla, Vanessa, and Emily. In some weird way, I think Emerson and Johnny believe in me too. It’s a short list but the most powerful and influential I’ve ever known. Just when I’m about to leave I’m starting to fall in love with everything about my life here.

It’s just EVERYTHING:

1. My family

2. The way I feel when I talk to Becca

3. The smell of Emily’s house

4. Walking through Rahway when it’s 100 degrees and we have miles left to go

5. Friday nights

6. Sunday mornings

7. The Pursuit

8. Avoiding Eric Ciano on a weekly basis

9. Copy Center

10. Danny

11. Jay

12. Tyree

13. Riding in the back of a cramped van with Becca, Carla, and Mark

14. Just the taste, smell, and texture of everything that comprises NJ.

I’m so in love.

I think I’m just super afraid of everything that I’m leaving behind. After all this time, my life is finally changing (somewhat) into what I want it to be. I’m not afraid anymore. God is my parachute, wings, wind currents and the firemen waiting down below to catch me when I fall. He is my everything and during the course of my journey, He’ll be by my side the entire time.